Well, I’m gonna try to write a post on my phone from bed. I apologize if it looks weird or different than normal. I’ve been a little quiet lately. Both here on the blog and in my personal life. I’ve even run my last two 3 milers without music on! I feel like I’m mentally digesting a lot so I’ve been spending more time in my own head than usual. I had a few thoughts though that might mean something to someone so I might as well share.
First off, I’ve been doing pretty well keeping up with my running schedule. I’m now in week two of marathon base training. It helps a ton that the weather has been absolutely perfect the last 4-5 days. Anyone else find its easier to stay on track when it’s nice out? My eating hasn’t been nearly as good but getting better. Which leads me to my next point. (Spoiler alert: I get all spiritual in the following paragraph so if it’s not your cup of tea, feel free to move on. No hard feelings.)
This weekend was Easter. Some years Im really good about setting aside a little extra time for prayer and meditation over Easter weekend. Not this year! I worked Friday, babysat the niece Saturday, and we hosted Easter dinner here Sunday. It just didn’t happen. I went into church Sunday morning not knowing what to expect to hear from the Lord since I spent so little time connecting with Him all weekend. What He showed me was so practical and true, I couldn’t believe I hadn’t realized it yet.
Some sin is a result of us and our human nature. Sometimes we can be effected as a result of others’ sin. Sometimes we’re effected by it just because sin is in this world. My binge eating and axiety issues aren’t my fault. Let me rephrase that. It’s not my fault that my brain is wired in a way that makes me have obsessive thoughts that manifest themselves in the form of binge eating and anxious thoughts. It is a result of sinful human nature. What a relief! Even better is that Christ died and rose again to overcome that sin. Whether it’s our sin, someone else’s sin, or sinful nature, we can claim freedom over that sin in our life! Just like when you repent for your sins or forgive someone else’s sin, it doesn’t mean that when we claim the power of Christ’s resurrection in our lives and over our own sinfum human nature we just sit idly by and do nothing. Repenting requires change, forgiveness requires actions of love, and receiving grace in an area of weakness requires surrender.
I don’t have to do this quitting-binge-eating thing on my own. In fact Christ already died and rose and paid for the sins of the world so I could also put this sin to death. It doesn’t mean I don’t have to try, but there is tremendous power in me working for me that is stronger than anything I face. The Lord doesn’t want us to be bound by anything. Of course he wants me free from anxious thoughts, from binge eating, because he already paid the penalty for those things. Why should I hold onto them then?
So I’m looking at this battle from a new perspective. Just like I held tightly to Jesus’s hand when I lost my job a couple months ago, like I trusted Him when money was tight, I’m going straight to Him with this too. I’m excited about how this will go. I’ve seen the Lord bless us for trusting Him with our jobs and our finances. I would expect this to be no different. I’m quitting binge eating for real this time. Not for me, but so the work of Jesus can be seen in my life. Not so I look skinny, but so my thoughts can rest on Him and not my anxious thoughts. Not so I run better for my own personal pride, but so I can train and complete a race to serve those the Lord loves and wants to bless.
Some serious stuff there. Like I said, I’ve been working through some stuff. Hopefully this spoke to some of you. If it did, I’d love to hear from you. His grace is enough, but he also calls us to be held accountable in community. Maybe through comments and sharing we can be that community. What do you say?